What causes me to love Jennifer? Is it her grace? Her kindness? Her humour? I realize that for much of our life together (47 years), I expected... demanded those things... and much more from her. My selfishness resulted in me being disappointed during much of that time, because I loved kindness and grace... not Jennifer, and my attitudes and actions reflected that. My heart was not turned toward her.
So - How can I model God's grand design for marriage as represented by His love for me (Romans 5:8) and to love Jennifer as in Ephesians 5:25? How can I get there... Is it even realistic? I recently read, "Love is always set on the beloved's welfare... so all of our actions should be motivated for their good. ALL our actions... every one." Too big? Well, big attitudes can be shaped through little actions.
When we walk to our local Save On I always carry the groceries home. Jen inevitably tells me "I can carry that" but I just don't want her to have to do something she doesn't really want to do. There are a thousand and one ways I can improve on being a husband, but in this instance, my concern is really focused on Jennifer. How can I best serve her? This is such a small, insignificant example, but small moments become habits and habits can (re)shape my character. I'm beginning to use common life situations by asking, "How can I bless Jen here?" I want to make love a verb in our marriage. Can you think of a way to bless your spouse today?
A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. John 13:34
Tom and Jennifer will celebrate their 47th wedding anniversary this month. They passionately lead in our Marriage Mentoring Ministry and serve as RGroup Leaders and Prayer Leaders.
